I knew it was inevitable I would shed a few tears, after all I packed up my life in just 10 days and the emotions associated with such a life-changing move were bound to boil over and explode. I just didn’t know when. What follows is what happened this morning, when without warning the floodgates opened and as expected the tears flowed.
Interestingly, my morning begins well, I wake feeling happy and decide to rearrange my apartment. Inspecting an adjacent unused room, I find a tall table, perfect for my cooker and wok. Putting this in place, I move the small bar fridge for better access and arrange all the other pieces to create a workable kitchen space. As I shuffle furniture, Angus & Julia’s calming voices and gentle tunes filter through the room, keeping me company and mixing beautifully with the scent of burning incense.
In my bedroom I move the bed so it faces the window, in this position I can watch a myriad of stars dance in the night sky. And as dawn breaks I will see the dark sky brighten as it bathes in the sun’s early morning light.
When I finish, I feel good and make my first coffee for the morning in my newly ‘designed’ kitchen. Taking my coffee to my desk, I open Facebook to see what friends and family have been up to in another part of the world. It is this moment when I see my cover image of Oscar & Stanley that tears begin to well. My eyes fill and my emotions erupt, I begin to sob and I cannot stop. I’m letting go. Not of my beloved family, friends and dogs, but of the emotions I have suppressed since making the decision to take my life to Penghu. I have expected this outpour of emotion and I let it come and allow it to wash over me for it refreshes and renews.
As I write this now, 3 hours later, I am not lonely or unhappy for I like it here and after spending the last 3 days getting to know my kids and the teaching role I have undertaken, I am happy with my decision.
Quite simply, I just miss those who I love most in the world and as expected tears flow…